At first glance it might seem that I am just a happy, normal girl who loves to bake and walk her dog. However, I have suffered with an eating disorder since I was 13. It was only in May 2014 when I realised that this Voice in my head was slowly but surely trying to kill me. And so began the long, hard, and painful journey which is recovery...

I want My Cocoa Stained Apron to be a special place...a place for reflection, memories, shared stories...and of course a little bit of cocoa-staining ;) Recovery might be the hardest thing you ever choose to do in this life. But it is also the bravest and best decision you will ever make.:)

Monday, 22 June 2015

Day 25: What and who makes me smile...:)

This is just what I needed today  - a little positive post!! As today has been a rather tough, in many more ways than one. And unfortunately my knee is no better. I feel as if I have been knocked down and kicked till black and blue, both physically, and mentally. But anyway, I got through it, and here I am at home again with my beloved kitten mug, filled to the brim with my favourite ever drink, and my dusty ole' laptop, faithfully humming merrily away as ever. ;) I got through today, tough as it was, and now, as I sit here reflecting on all which I went through, today and in the past before... I do believe that I do have the strength, to keep on fighting and pushing through the tough times (as, unfortunately,everyone does have tough days's just a matter of learning how to cope and deal with those sort of days!!:) ) and working towards making myself a happier, more positive, more confident, more independent, stronger young woman. That being ME, Emmy Snelgrove. NOT Emmy with an ED. And if I an do it, I know that you can, too. Don't EVER give up. If you believe you can, you WILL!!! <3 

And so, here is ANOTHER little list (sorryyyyyy me and my lists huh ;) ), of what makes me smile from ear to ear ;)

  • HUGS...even when I'm feeling really down or upset, being enveloped in the arms of someone who cares is guaranteed to make me smile and feel better in an instant <3
  • The friends who have stuck by me, through good times and bad times, through the laughter and the tears. I once heard this saying, When life raised me high, my friends knew who I was. When life pushed me down to the ground, I knew who my friends were. I think this is so true, for me in particular. 
  • Comments on my blog....I love reading comments from people and answering makes my day to hear from a reader and always brings a huge smile to my face when I see there's a comment awaiting my attention :)
  • Errrr..well I HAD to include hot choc, didn't I? ;) And melted chocolate. ahhhhhhhhh :p

  • My beloved springer spanial, Benny <3 The cutest, boldest, most lovable doggy ever <3
  • Felix, the little black and white bundle of trouble who is my gorgeous feline companion. I mean, just look at him...isn't he the purr-fect reason to smile from ear to ear? ;)
  • My amazing granny <3 My granny Hillier and I have always been close, ever since I was a little girl, and years later nothing much has changed in that respect. She is the sort of person who would lift your spirits even on the most oppressing and hardest of days. She can talk the legs off a donkey and always makes me chuckle and smile, with her anecdotes and old wive's tales and witty sayings. And most of all, I know that she cares for me and loves me unconditionally, regardless of my past, my mistakes, my wrong choices. I only have to pick up the phone and hear her voice, and then my day is brightened in an instant and a massive smile creeps across my face. <3
  • Getting handwritten letters in the post!!!! Love them so so should see me when I get one I'm like the little kid under the Christmas tree about to open his little pile of tightly wrapped, colourful prezzies <3
  • And YOU, my readers. Your kind thoughts and caring advice, your amazing support and beautiful words...they honestly MEAN THE WORLD to me and to hear from you is guaranteed to make me smile, from ear to ear.. <3 xxx


  1. love this post! hope your well
    p.s your cats so cute :) xo

    1. <3 aww thanks so much hun and I hope you are well too <3 <3 <3 heehee he is!! But he is SO bold! ;) xxxx

  2. This was such an uplifting post to read. Also, can I write to you? If you love getting handwritten letters in the post, I'd love to write to you! Xxx

    1. <3 aww hun I would love that so so much! shall I send you my address on facebook?:) <3 hope you are doing ok hun :* xxxx

    2. Ok, private message it to me and I'll write to you when I get the chance to!! Ooh I'm excited now :) <3 xxx

    3. <3 ME TOO i love letters Annie!! I wil do that ASAP <3 all my love hun :* xxxx

  3. Hi my dear friend, if you send me your address you will get a handwritten letter, I love writing letter so much!
    Love and hug, Mary

    1. Oh hun I would love that!! I will email my address to you dear <3 absolutely can't wait to hear from you :* xxx