At first glance it might seem that I am just a happy, normal girl who loves to bake and walk her dog. However, I have suffered with an eating disorder since I was 13. It was only in May 2014 when I realised that this Voice in my head was slowly but surely trying to kill me. And so began the long, hard, and painful journey which is recovery...

I want My Cocoa Stained Apron to be a special place...a place for reflection, memories, shared stories...and of course a little bit of cocoa-staining ;) Recovery might be the hardest thing you ever choose to do in this life. But it is also the bravest and best decision you will ever make.:)

Saturday, 28 March 2015

The Best Moments of Your Life so Far... :) xxxx

And so in continuation from my post yesterday, I compiled a list of the most special moments in my life so far. Looking back into the past and discovering these precious, simply unforgettable little moments... recalling them, reflecting on them, and then extracting them from the fogginess of memory to be transformed into the written word - was such a lovely and positive way to start off my day, and prompted me to look into the future ahead of me, and the many more special, happy moments yet still to come. :)

  • In 2000 my family and I went for our first holiday in the beautiful county of Sligo in the West. It was so, so special....the weather was perfect, the location simply breathtaking...we stayed in a little rose-covered cottage overlooking the sea, nestled between the steeply sloped, flat-topped mountains characteristic to this gorgeous gem of a county in the North-west of Ireland.
  • My childhood holidays to West Cork when Matt was undergoing his treatment for luekemia. For the duration of Matt's chemotherapy, we weren't able to go abroad, so instead we went to Clonakilty each August of those three years. West Cork endeared itself to me - the long golden beaches, the pretty colourful houses of Clonakilty, the sparkling sapphire-blue waters of the Atlantic.
  • Our trip to California when Matt finished his cancer treatment. We spent two weeks holidaying in the "Golden State", stopping by at San Francisco, Yosemite, Monterey, LA and San Diego. It was the trip of a lifetime. :)
  • Christmas 2005 when it snowed LOADS at home. Jumping up and down on a snow-covered trampoline sticks out in my mind as being particularly memorable. ;)

  • My school tour when I was in 4th Class - we went to the Dunamore Caves in neighbouring Kilkenny followed by a visit to Kilkenny Castle...I was in my element. :) 
  • My last show at Primary School when I was in 6th Class - it was so special to me because I was one of the leading ladies in our farcical take of Robin Hood and I got to wear a gorgeous long blue dress. During sixth class I had really got the knack of Irish dancing, and during this particular show day I had ample oppurtunity to show off my newfound skill. I loved irish dancing...I wish I was still able to do it :'( 
  • My first holiday in Mallorca with my family after the Junior Cert...I instantly fell in love with this pictueresque, sun-soaked island off the coast of Spain. There was eight of us altogether - us five, my granny, my aunty and my auntie's friend. We stayed in a big villa in the countryside near Pollenca.
  • Visiting a very special friend in Spain after the Leaving Cert ;) <3 xxx
  • Going out for the first time - haha such a funny and nostalgic sort of memory!! Being the midget that I was, I wasn't able to join my friends when they went off together to the teenage discos and clubs when I was sixteen/seventeen, and so I was itching for my eighteenth birthday to come round so that I could join them. The first time I officially "went out" was the night my friends and I graduated from was, without a doubt, the best night out ever, and the memory of such a fun night will forever be imprinted in my heart <3
  • Getting the LC results...such a lovely, unbeatable feeling when you see those grades on the paper and realise that you accomplished the impossible, you've passed your Leaving Cert and got the points you were aiming for!! :)
  • My debs ball...OMG what a night...I felt so pretty in my long slashed dress with my hair done up all posh :o

  • Going to Paris in TY...especially our trip to Disneyland of course ;)
  • And I think I have to include my first weekend out of hospital....that moment was just so special and so perfect, when I walked out those sliding doors in the beautiful sunlight of early Spring <3 
And I know there are probably so many more <3 it is moments like these which stand to remind us that life IS worth fighting for. That despite the hardship and the sadness and the struggles...there always IS light at the end of the tunnel and that you can make your life one of happiness, light and joy. So never lose hope. Never give in. Live the life you love and make even MORE of those special, priceless moments. :) Life is too short to be anything but happy. <3 xxxx


  1. Wow*_* such a heart-warming post again huniiii <3
    These are really really special memories you share and it must have been so amaaaaaaazing living them all :) they sound so lovely and much like fun :) they all made me giggle a bit hunniii :) and you are so right: LIFE IS FOR LIVING AND LIVING IS FREE ;) so don´t let our future memories be affected by such a stupid voice, which just excists in our heads, let´s see the good things in life and focus on them ;)
    I am so proud of yoou Emmy ;)
    Lots of loooooooooooove xxx Ange

    1. Awwww thanks so much huni :* And for sure hun we will make so many other special memories like these, and I want meeting my extra-special Nutella_Loving Friend (I know you know who I mean hun!!! ;) ) for REAL to be something else to be added to my future list of precious moments hun!!! <3 Love you so so much hun, I really hope you had a lovely birthday yesterday, sending you so much love and lots of hugs and kisses hun :* xxxxxxxx

    2. Oh you are sooooo welcome Cutiiiiiiiiie :-* OMG I can´t wait for that hun =) hihiii this sounds so lovely :) I guess I might probably know this special friend Emmy ;) Of course I am not suuuuure of it, but there is a guuuuuuuuess :) and I will definitively add this to my future list tooooo ;) I am sure there will be many unbelievable things we could do together :)
      OMG *_* thaaaanks again for all the lovely wishes, they realy made my day :) and made me feel like the real ANGE ;) lots and lots of LOVE to my special friend ;) xxxxxxxx

    3. awww hun of COURSE it is you huni :* and oh my goodness hun we may make a list of things we can do hun, the possibilities are endless and there are so many things we can do , so many places and countries we can go to, so many sights to be seen and experiences to be had! <3 awww you are so so welcome huni :* love you loadsssss hun <3 xxxxxxxxx

    4. Hihiiiiii this is soooo lovely *_* I wanna have that as a real nickname for me :D
      OMG hun you are so right ;) sosooo many things to see ;) it reaaaally won´t be easy to decide where to start :) but I am sure it will be a journey for a lifetime :) so fantastic ;) Looooove you soso much :) <3 xxxxxxxx