At first glance it might seem that I am just a happy, normal girl who loves to bake and walk her dog. However, I have suffered with an eating disorder since I was 13. It was only in May 2014 when I realised that this Voice in my head was slowly but surely trying to kill me. And so began the long, hard, and painful journey which is recovery...

I want My Cocoa Stained Apron to be a special place...a place for reflection, memories, shared stories...and of course a little bit of cocoa-staining ;) Recovery might be the hardest thing you ever choose to do in this life. But it is also the bravest and best decision you will ever make.:)

Monday, 23 July 2018

I sit down on the grass and look down at the landscape stretched below me. A landscape alight with the luscious shades and hues of high summer: golden wheatfields bowing in homage to the sun, shady wooded glades of emerald green; clusters of heather, mauvy pink and paling peach, and then the wafting poppy fields, as red and as freely flowing oin that brisk wind as fresly drawn blood spurting from an open wound. The scarlet induces within me a shudder, inevitbly turing my thoughts to the pain deep inside.

I turn my euyes away from this external beauty to examine something alot more closer and known, that being the contours and inclines of my own body. I stare for a long time at the thigs and the arms. 

Freedom. Its a word which I once didnt comprehend the true meaning of. but with the passig of years in recovery came a maturiry, a growth, an increased awareness and understanfding. 

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